10 Things I Hate About Me

Thanks Sherry at Life With Sherry for picking me to do this meme.

Of course, I can’t be just like everyone else, so I had to put my little spin on things. Originally, the meme was to tell 10 things about your self, but since I’ve done those a few time, I thought I’d do this one with a twist. If you’re tagged, then you can do whichever one suits your mood.

So hate is a really strong word. Let’s change it to dislike and move on, shall we?

And it could go without saying that there are more than 10 things that I don’t like about myself, especially if I’m running close to my “Give Me Chocolate And Back Away” time. Fortunately for you, I’m not near it, so I easily left it at 10.

1. I’m pretty self-centered. I’ve shared with you that I struggle with thinking of others first. However, God, in all his infinite wisdom, gives me plenty of opportunities to work on this one.
2. Sometimes, I’m dissatisfied and complain when I have no right to complain. Overall, my life is extremely blessed, and I need to remember that fact.
3. I get angry to quickly. Too often I jump the gun about a situation without having all the facts. My poor kids… at least they get to hear an adult say “I’m sorry” a lot.
4. I’m bossy. Sometimes it comes in handy; sometimes it’s plain old annoying.
5. I cannot remember jokes! It’s so annoying to get into one and then have to backtrack because I forgot a major part and then forget the ending and wind up just tapering off at the end.
6. I’m a terrible penpal. I started writing to Lori, aka Pezmama and now a former blogger, a couple of years ago. I kept it up for a while, but the last letter I sent to her was a Valentine’s Day card. Somehow that doesn’t equate to great letter writing in my book.
7. I don’t always answer the phone. Most of the time I’ll let the answering machine get it. I mainly do it to prove that the phone doesn’t have power over me. This tidbit drives Mr. Right nuts.
8. I’m so forgetful. Sometimes I start something and
9. I get envious of others too often. This attitude doesn’t always work well with trying to have a God-like life. I’m sure that God’s envious of nothing.
10. I don’t have the world’s greatest willpower. For example, I need to exercise. I know that I need to exercise. I actually want to exercise. But if it’s cold outside, I’ll read a book instead. Or take this one, I’m full from dinner and quite satisfied. But I see a brownie and suddenly, I want that brownie. I need that brownie. I have the brownie, but then I regret my decision withing minutes because now I’m uncomfortably stuffed. The sad thing is that I knew I would feel that way if I ate the brownie, and I ate it anyway.

Okay now I tag Pam, Susanne, Chilihead, Sister Honey Bunch, Beck (this one should be easy for you, right?) and My Best Investments. And feel free to change the meme back to things you love about yourself if you’re not as negative about yourself as I am.

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1987

Tragedy struck the summer before my sophomore year. Mandy, my dear friend and confidant, had to move. Being in our military town certainly had its advantages: new friends, cultural diversity, southern upbringing, the determination to hold dear to others while they were around. The major disadvantage was that most everyone had to move just when you formed a beautiful friendship. So before our second year of high school began, I had to help my best friend pack up and move halfway across the state to Murfreesboro. So with many tears and as many promises to stay friends, I waved my sweet Mandy off to a new year somewhere new. As much as it hurt to say goodbye, at least I had the stability of familiarity and an established community of friends. Mandy was starting all over in high school. That’s not always an easy move.

However, God had a funny twist in store for me. Our home rooms, that first 10 minutes of accounting for each student’s presence, was divided up by last name. I was in the room that held M-P, which allowed me to start the day with my friends Danny and Jennifer… always a good thing when you’re in many of the same classes. We really helped each other with the homework not done (wink, wink) But suddenly there was a new boy in the room. He was quiet and well-mannered, but that didn’t stop me from walking up to him, plopping down beside him and commencing to hold a conversation with him. (I know, it’s shocking that I would make a big jump out there like that, huh?)

I soon discovered that I would have several classes with this boy named Ken. Like me, he elected to take the AP classes in almost everything: English, Trig, chemistry. Unlike me, he was artistic in an entirely different way. Where I was all about the vocal and dramatic art, he was an actual artist who left something of his talent to be seen by others. And he played something rather unheard of at that time – soccer. I had no idea what it was, but I soon found out.

So out stepped Mandy and in stepped Ken. God is good in so many ways. He knew that I needed Ken to keep my balance and perspective. He was logical, grounded – you know, typical male characteristics – but fun and witty, but not as the same caliber as me. He appreciated my outgoingness and sense of adventure as much as I loved his steadiness and outlook on life, not to mention his more intelligent answers to a number of math questions. He was a great conversationalist and (eventually) a wonderful movie/dance/pal-around mate. We made a great pair from day one.

It’s rather odd having a guy for a best friend. Well, not for me, but it was for most other people, probably my parents too. Most of my friends kept asking if Ken and I were an item. “No, we’re just really great friends,” was my usually reply. The funny thing was that as the year advanced, Ken decided that he wanted to be more than just friends. I distinctly remember the note declaring his affections for me. He also asked me out to a school dance in a group date setting. It was exciting but weird and unsettling at the same time. I didn’t know what I felt about Ken except that he was my best friend, that I could talk to him about anything and everything and that I spent more time with him than anyone else. Knowing that I was closed to dating age (16) and that his parents would be taking us to the dance, my parents let me go. They had met Ken enough to know that he was a decent guy.

We went. We had a great time as usual, but in my heart, I knew that I couldn’t see myself with him. Why? He was Catholic. I didn’t want to get involved with someone where religion might eventually play a huge factor in our relationship. (Please don’t ask how I knew that was something to consider. It seemed like such a mature decision at the time.) Sure I loved most everything about him, but I valued his friendship so much more. After explaining all these feelings to him, he was upset for a bit but then accepted them gracefully, and we agreed that our friendship was worth more than what might have developed over time… because he was staying Catholic and I wasn’t converting. Fortunately, he was a man of his word. We didn’t have any kind of breakdown in our relationship. If anything, it was stronger afterwards.

The school year progressed beautifully, full of more love of English with Mrs. Dobson, fun in French II, a new found love of chemistry (Loved Mr. Como and his teaching style, not to mention the experiments!), and of course Concert Choir. Yes, readers, I progressed enough to make it into the top choir. Woo hoo! It didn’t matter that I went from a first soprano to an alto. I was just so happy to be in the class. Don’t ask. I don’t understand it either. And the bonus was that there was a new teacher whom I adored, Miss Morrow. I loved being around her so much that I was soon given the nickname Shadow. Unfortunately for me, she was only there for a semester because she was getting married. The nerve of her! (At least she let us sing at her wedding.)

So we had a new teacher, Ms. Thomas; she was just as likable and kind to us. We were quite pleased with her as a teacher, even if she did start the semester off track. She was in an accident and began her classes a week late on crutches and with a black eye. Hey, at least everyone listened well to her out of pity.

Plays became a vital part of my high school experience. We had a new drama teacher, Mr. Collins. He was a large, gregarious, young teacher who brought new life to the stage. His first production was Godspell, and though I didn’t win a part, I took on a backstage role as a set maker and a props assistant in order to learn all that I could from theater experience. One huge role that I took great pride in doing was being the daisy pusher-upper. (In one scene where Jesus was talking about the flowers, he made them “grow”. My being the skinny-minnie, 80-lbs-soaking-wet person that I was, I was the one deemed small enough to crawl under the slightly raised platform to handle that task. I relished that distinction.)

I worked on the other plays as well: The Star-Spangled Girl as the Prop Manager, and finally I had my chance to be on stage as an extra in Grease. I was a pink lady and other various extras throughout the play. My favorite part was at the opening of the second act where I was one of the many people getting ready for the big dance. During the rehearsals, Mr. Collins let us do our own thing to see what would come out of it. For my part, I started stuffing my bra with tissues, making me much more endowed than God had in mind. He watched me, started busting out laughing and then told me to keep that bit, no matter what. Later in the dance scene, when some girl stole my date, I reached into my bra, pulled out a tissue and started wailing as I ran off stage. I got more laughs out of that little gesture. That made me happy.

In 1987, I turned 16. My friend Jennifer threw a huge surprise party for me and all our friends. It was wonderful, not to mention really crowded… I felt so good that night. My hair looked good and no pimples the size of Ireland. I was wearing my oversized white button down, my beige pants that were rolled tightly against my legs, my slip-on tennis shoes and my really cool Swatch Watch. As a matter of fact, it was so cool that Jennifer asked to see it to show it to someone else. Then Danny said that it was a warm party night and everyone should take off their shoes. Then Ken asked me to go out to the back yard with him to say hi to those out there. As soon as I hit the back yard, the next think I knew two guys had me up and over the side of the pool. I’d say that it bothered me, but that would be lying. I used that time to splash everyone else. My only problem came when I realized I was wearing a white shirt… Ummm, white and water do not a good combination make. Laughs all around, along with a towel and a new set of Jennifer’s clothes and the party was a lot of fun.

It was actually a great start to that fun summer and the joys of being allowed (finally) to drive.

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Who What When Where Meme

I found this meme at Pam’s place, Without Fear. I couldn’t help myself.

• Where is your cell phone? In my purse… along with my new matching Bluetooth which I still haven’t gotten used to yet.
• Your significant other? Well, assuming you mean Mr. Right, he’s upstairs in the shower. Hey! That gives me an idea. I’ll be back in a bit…
• Your hair? Well, some of it I’m sure is down the drain now… But the rest is still on top of my head.
• Your mother? In Florida with my Dad
• Your father? In Florida with my Mom
• Your favorite thing? My favorite thing is still upstairs getting ready for work. (My two other favorite things are at school.)
• Your dream last night? Gone. I didn’t have any Chocolate Fudge ice cream to bring out the good stuff.
• Your favorite drink? My favorite drink is separated in different parts of the kitchen, waiting to be mixed for a wonderfully fruity and refreshing cocktail. That gives me another idea! But I’ll wait until tonight to follow through on that one.
• Your dream/goal? To go on a long, romantic trip with Mr. Right to Italy
• The room you’re in? Kitchen, but I’d rather be in the bathroom (see above)
• Your fears? They’re locked in the remotest part of my heart, wanting to come out, but I’ve prayed to God that he’ll keep them imprisoned for the rest of my life. Those suckers are gonna be there a looooong time.
• Where do you want to be in 6 years? Happily living with Mr. Right, while the The Girl is getting ready to go to her graduation and The Boy is preparing to hit the high school scene. Good night… All that in six years?! Oh, that’s too soon.
• Where were you last night? Home with the family, taking a walk with the family, then reading a book – but not with the family. We did however all pile onto the bed and read our own books. So I lied. I did read with the family.
• What you’re not? Tall or perfect or as funny as I think I am or as thin as you think I am
• Muffins? No, I’m not a muffin either. But if I were, I’d be a blueberry or strawberry one.
• One of your wish list items? I’ve already told you that one… More nets please!
• Where you grew up? Millington, Tennessee – but technically speaking, I’m still growing up even if it means that I won’t get an inch taller in height.
• The last thing you did? Took a drink of yummy coffee (Thanks Avon for our wonderful gift!)
• What are you wearing? A tank and black exercise pants, which have been poorly named in my case…
• Your TV? OFF, and that suits me just fine.
• Your pets? At my mother-in-awe’s house. We miss that cat.
• Your computer? I’d love to say iBook, but wouldn’t you know it? We got one that crashed (gasp!), and we have to have it fixed. Now I’m on the PC in the kitchen.
• Your life? Well-lived and well-loved
• Your mood? I’m feeling pretty happy and content right now.
• Missing someone? Yes! Would you all come for visits sometime? I could use some company to share this good mood. You bring the wine. Mr. Right and Iwill make the pie.
• Your car? No, I’m not missing my car, although I love my sweet Accord.
• Something you’re not wearing? Well, a bra for starters… (#19)
• Favorite store? TJ Maxx, Walmart, Target, Aldi, Junior League store – basically anywhere I can get a great deal at an incredibly low price
• Your summer? Will be spent mostly at home with Mr. Right, thanks the ever-rising gas prices. The kids will be at Grandma’s again and hopefully, we’ll be packing up and moving into a new home before the kids return. Hey, one can always hope!
• Like someone? Well, I always pictured myself like Sandra Bullock or Katharine Hepburn, at least in their funnier roles. Knowing y’all, you’re thinking I’m more like Grover or Oscar the Grouch
• Your favorite color? Blue. No, red! Aaaaahhhh… (Name that movie.)
• When is the last time you laughed? This morning. The Boy tried on all his shorts and he can be pretty entertaining when you get him one on one.
• Last time you cried? Hmmm… I’ll say Sunday because sometimes those sermons hit right were I need to be hit.
• Who will repost this? Good question. You tell me!

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The Birthday Fun

Sorry Mom and Chris… you’ll have to wait til next Monday for the high school memories and the really great music.

Thank you all so much for the sweet birthday wishes. I did indeed have a wonderful day! It’s amazing how much fun you can have when you and your family are pretty footloose and fancy free.

I posted the birthday list before we did anything that day, so there were a few minor additions to it.

First of all, the weather was supposed to be rainy and cold, but one of God’s gift to me was a beautifully sunny 70 day. The kids and I took the opportunity to plant some flowers while Mr. Right was mowing the lawn. The hanging pots were missing from our pretty view.

Secondly, our neighbor, the one who works for AMC, came over to see if we wanted to go see a movie. (He gets free tickets and he offered them to us.) So we went to go see Iron Man, which I must tell you was thoroughly enjoyable. There were a couple of parts that I wish the story left out – like a one night stand, but they only implied the one night stand, not showed it. But the story was witty and enjoyable, the graphics were phenomenal and the time was well spent. Oh! And stay to the very end past the credits. (We always stay to find the caterer… don’t know why, we just have always done that.) Anyway, we stayed to the end and there was an extra little bit at the end.

Dinner couldn’t be any better… except maybe if Addie and Ben could have made it. The food was delish and the company was even better. I think we all had a great time together.

Everyone came back to the house for desserts, wine and fun. The funny part about the evening was that a couple stopped by to pick up a sheet for the house and began looking in the back yard. The Girl came running in to say that a weird man was checking out the house, so Mr. Right went out to check him out. Next thing I know, the man is inside looking around the house. Ummm, did I mention the fact that it was my birthday and I didn’t waste anytime cleaning a thing? So there were unmade beds, dirty laundry and a kitchen that had the telltale signs of baking. I ran up to at least try to compile the dirty underwear into one place and to put away the ironing board. Next think I know, the man’s wife is looking at the house, and I begged someone to come upstairs with me to make the beds and to clean the toothpaste out of the sink. (Thank you, Laura!) The funny thing is that if that couple buys this house (and they did seem very interested), then that will prove once again that it’s God in control, not us, because we broke every house-selling rule that day. We had guests, we didn’t have a clean house, our kids were climbing the trees, and we literally aired our dirty laundry. I find the entire situation truly humorous and fitting to the honor of God. Kind of like the walls of Jericho falling down with only some people walking around and blowing trumpets. We’ll see if they want it, but if not, it’s at least a great story…

The rest of the night we relaxed, played charades and SWAP! and enjoyed each other. (Oh, and I received some wonderful gifts. I’m geared up for chocolate, coffee, there’s a new planter on the front porch, an AMC giftcard, a new Bluetooth piece for when I’m willing to talk on the cell, and three wonderful massages in my future. Oh, and my kids made me the most precious coupons to use with them later. I can’t wait to use them!)

I plopped into bed, tired and happy. I couldn’t have had a better birthday at all. It’s good to be 37.

I’ve taken the day off to go on a field trip with The Boy. I’ll catch y’all on the flip side tomorrow.

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37

What does turning 37 mean to me?

1. Lunch the week before with my boss (steak with blue cheese crumbles)
2. Gift card to favorite Chinese restaurant
3. Lunch the day before birthday with coworkers for worlds best salad
4. Thoughtful gifts from them (I’ll be smelling really great for a while.)
5. Smiling at the number of “birthday gifts” from my online friends (Yay y’all!)
6. Waking to kisses from the not so little ones
7. Morning snuggles from them (still!)
8. Coffee in bed with the man I love
9. Biscuits and gravy
10. Morning serenade
11. Homemade cards
12. Special gifts from the kids
13. Checking to see if I still look young
14. Having a day with no plans (that I know of anyway)
15. Being waited on hand and foot
16. Time alone with Mr. Right (ahem)
17. Reading next P.D. James book in series
18. Not having to make lunch
19. Spending time with my favorite people
20. Calls from the family with well wishes
21. Dinner at my favorite place (see #2)
22. With lots of friends
23. Much laughing
24. Much conversing
25. Returning home for games
26. Charades
27. Strawberry pie
28. Apple pie
29. Brownies
30. Decaf coffee
31. Wine
32. Opening gifts
33. Tucking tired-but-not-sleepy kids into bed
34. Thanking friends for their love and the pleasure of their company
35. Falling into bed happy
36. Knowing that I have an extremely blessed life
37. Thanking God for giving me another wonderful year

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1986

High school: The start of where you really learn about life, who you are and who you didn’t want to be.

Being the nerdy, school-loving person that I was, I could not wait to start ninth grade. The shear joy of signing up for my choices, finding out how much time I would have to run from one class to another, discovering who would be my classmates for the next four months (or if it were a full semester class then for eight months all together.) Oh and the clubs! We could join clubs of all sorts. Really, I was a social butterfly that first year: Thespians (All the hazing during pledge week! Every time a member approached, Danny, Jennifer and I had to fall to our knees and loudly proclaim “Oh great Thespian I adore thee!”), Choir, FCA, Pep, French… and others that I can’t think of at all right now.

Bummer. I only made it in Girls Chorus. Oh well, I could sing Soprano there as well as in Chorus. And then of course I had to take the dreaded PE class that every upper classmen swore was better to get out of the way early rather than later in the high school way of things. But at least I had Mandy in that class. If I’m going to look like a dork in that ugly goldenrod t-shirt and those black shorts, we’ll at least do it together. But I did make it in all the AP classes I wanted, which was probably a miracle of sorts because most of my friends were smarter than me. (I’m not saying that I wasn’t smart; I know I was. I’m just saying that on the smart scale, I was on the lower end of the smart stick. Hey, I’m just keeping it real.)

First day there, I started making additional friends. Being outspoken and witty at the right moment can do that for you. (Or not, I have no delusions that everyone loved me.) But the transition from attending a school with 600 to a school with 1600 wasn’t too hard on me. Of course I worried about being cool and fitting in, but for the most part, I didn’t worry about being liked or making my mark. Amazing, when I think about it. Who goes into high school completely comfortable with who she is? Sure I worried about the *cough, cough* occasional zit and the complete lack of datability, but overall, I really liked who I was, where I was at and who was traveling that road with me.

Football games were fun and freeing. I often met my friends for the game. Cheering, laughing, yelling and enjoying those warm Southern nights… A Friday night really couldn’t get any better. Saturdays nights often turned into sleepovers or Youth Group activities. Oh, and it was due to sleepovers that I really discovered how weird I was. I was often awake and out of bed by 7 AM. How boring it was to be at a friend’s house when everyone slept until 10 AM. Sigh.

PE – not coed, thank goodness! Freshmen girls have a hard enough time dealing with the way they look without having any of the guys as onlookers as well. Mandy and I had a great time learning how to pretend that we could do anything athletic. Wait a second, athletics was an area where I was very insecure. I was 5’ 1” and a whopping 80 lbs, if that. I’d always been the shortest and smallest in class and therefore the last to be picked on teams (a tradition I loathe, by the way. Lucky for those elementary educators that I didn’t allow myself to be scarred for life and have traumatic emotional issues over always being unwanted…) But AHA! Mandy and I learned to kick boo-tay in Volleyball and guess who took first place in the Badminton Championship? Uh-huh! You got it! We bad! We bad! Hey, it made our entire torturous time in that class well worth it. Leave me be in my glory days.

One class that I couldn’t wait to attend was English with Mrs. Werner. Oh if only everyone had a mentor or encourager like her! She was the first teacher to bring English to life for me. She expected top notch and, if she didn’t get it, she would send your submittal back to you with instructions to do better. She encouraged reading and opinionating what you read. She delighted in reviews, creative writing and the idea that books are something to be enjoyed, not endured.

Girls Chorus was unique. There I made friends with a myriad, most of whom were named Jennifer pr some variation of the name. Some became really close buddies. We laughed, enjoyed music together and, well, mostly we felt sorry for our teacher, Mr. Svelte. Poor man. He tried so hard, but he had such a spineless way about him. This characteristic did not bode well for anyone teaching teenagers. I cannot count the number of times that year that he came to school in the same clothes because his wife kicked him out of the house and refused to let him enter, even for necessities. He was a nice man, but slightly off-kilter due to a number of factors. Our chatting, giggling selves couldn’t have helped at all.

I discovered the joy of working a play. Building a set, painting, rehearsals, long hours memorizing lines… and the camaraderie that is naturally built when working several hours a day together, only getting longer and longer as the performances drew near. These were the moments that I loved. With these surroundings came a kind of vitality on which I could almost feed. I just knew that I had found another niche, one that could bring me joy from a different perspective. Although I didn’t make it into any of the plays that year, I vowed that I would the next. That was a promise I intended to keep…

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You Can Quote Me On That

Chilihead posted some quotes that were her favorites. I thought I’d totally piggyback on her and do the same. Because I am a copycat. And that’s what friends do. They steal good stuff from those they love. You can quote me on that.

“I intend to live forever. So far, so good.” – Steven Wright

“I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin

“The 12-step chocoholics program: NEVER BE MORE THAN 12 STEPS AWAY FROM CHOCOLATE!” – Terry Moore

“A friend is someone with whom you dare to be yourself.” – Frank Crane

“Just do it.” – Nike

“Live today as if it were your last.” – Anonymous

“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.” – Elizabeth Kubler Ross

“Live and learn. Die and forget it all” – Shalee’s Mom

“Be still and know that I am God.” – God

“A face without freckles is like a night without stars.” – Anonymous

“God’s gifts put man’s best dreams to shame.” – Elizabeth Barrett Browning

“Life isn’t fair. It’s just fairer than death, that’s all.” – William Goldman

“Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, you’re right.” – Henry Ford

“I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it.” – Jack Handey

“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.” – A. A. Milne

“An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.” – M.K. Gandhi

“Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” – Franklin P. Jones

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on.” – Thomas Jefferson

“I love you, Mommy, more than anyone else in the world… but not more than God.” – The Boy

“Mom, this is my Favorite Meal ever!” – The Girl (said at almost every meal)

“You gonna eat that?” – Mr. Right

I have to stop now. I could go on forever… I didn’t even add any movie quotes, and I have a number of them! What about you? What quotes mean something to you or just make you smile?

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WFMW – Second Glances

Seeing how I recently wrote about my eyesight, I thought this was very appropriate to post today.

I received an email from a friend yesterday.

Shalee,

I am getting a kick out of your memory blogs! I’m not sure if you watched MTV when your parents weren’t looking, but Bowling for Soup has a song called 1985 and you should totally watch the video…especially if you watched music videos in the 80’s! I really enjoy checking out the music you’ve selected for the years. Many of the songs were featured on Miami Vice (1985 & 86) as I have found a site that has old episodes online! Hope you and Mr. Right are doing great!

— Chris

After reading it, I replied with this:

Well, ummm, I’m glad that it’s making you sick?! You might want to have a bowl around for the next few Mondays…

I’ll have to check out the Bowling for Soup song. I’ve heard it, but I’ve not seen the video. (Yeah, I was an 80’s video watcher – back when they were great videos and not soft porn. I have to tell you, I never watched Miami Vice. That was such a guys show and it never, ever interested me. But at least it had great music!

We’re great here. Hope all is well with you too!

Shalee

Sometime later I happen to glance at his original email and then sent out the following to him:

Hey Chris… I have to tell you that I thought the first line read I’m getting SICK of your memory blogs… Perhaps I need glasses after all! So ignore the first paragraph of the last email I sent you!

To which he responded:

I don’t care who you are, THAT’S FUNNY! I would never let you know if I was sick of your blogs! That’s just too rude! It’s just fun looking back and you hear a song and instantly you remember where you were in life when that song came out. I’m glad you got to watch some MTV when you were young. You for sure need to see the Bowling For Soup Video now as it totally spoofs Robert Palmer, Michael Jackson, Run DMC, George Michael, etc. Hope you have a great week!

So my advice is to either read your mail carefully or don’t tell the world the day before that you’re thankful for the fabulous eyesight that you have. It could come back to bite you later.

Want some really good tips? Head to Shannon’s for some words of wisdom. For some words of wisdom.

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1985

Eighth Grade

What can be said about this year?

It was a year that brought me face to face with so many things. Some good, some that no child should have to know.

I was in my first wedding that year. My mom’s best friend’s daughter was marrying and she asked for me to be her flower girl. Yeah, at 13 years old. Well, I felt lovely (though not beautiful) in that long pink gown. I can remember the pictures of my standing next to Sean, the ring bearer. He too was 13 years old and a member of our youth group. I’m sure that he was only in the wedding because his mother made him be in it. That made for great pictures, let me tell you…

In school, we began the process of having multiple classes with other students. Though the classes were assigned, I remember the thrill of walking down the halls to attend with different friends. Danny remained in my music and English class. It was in this English class where I learned, really learned, the value of a good debate. (Oh how I wish I could remember the teacher’s name! He was a huge man who looked exactly like a gorilla and he had the condescending way of looking at his students over his glasses.) It was in his class that I sparred verbally for my earned A in the class. He was tough, intelligent, but not unbendable. I do believe I received my A, not only because of my work, but because I was willing to challenge him on a intellectual level rather than whining.

Fortunately Mandy and I still had three classes together, one of which was Social Studies with Mr. Cumming. That man was a hoot! He definitely brought out the ornery in me. Mandy and I were often trying to pull some sort of mischievous deed on him.

Unfortunately, it was also in Mr. Cumming’s class that I received my first migraine. As I was sitting in class, my sight slowly started to fade into white spots. Eventually, I became scared enough that I poked Mandy in the back and pleaded with her to ask Mr. Cumming if she could take me to the office to call my mom. I must have looked the part of scared well; she didn’t even question me. She went straight up to make the request. To which he told her to sit down and for me to quit starting trouble. I think I was able to sit five more minutes before I had Mandy take me up to Mr. Cumming. I recall with clarity the calmness that I had while describing what I could and couldn’t see. And then I broke out into tears. He then let Mandy take me to the office. I think he figured out I wasn’t fooling at that time.

Next up to convince: my mother. I don’t mean to say that I cried wolf a lot. I didn’t. But I’m sure it will come as a huge surprise to you that I was a drama queen. (I can hear the gasp from here!) When I got Mandy to call her, I started bawling about not being able to see and my head hurting and could she please come and get me. She came and got me and we went straight to the naval hospital. There I was told that I had to stay up all night with nothing in but water and then come in the following morning for an EKG or an EEG or something with a G. That was another fun night let me tell you. My parents took shifts to make sure that I stayed away. Can I just share with you how much there wasn’t on tv at zero dark thirty in the morning?

Cut to the quick: The guy put all this plaster around my head, stuck some wires to my noggin and turned on a machine. I still don’t know what it was all about, really. All I know is that I remember wanting to fall asleep each time I closed my eyes, but the guy didn’t say that I could or couldn’t so I jerking my eyes open. Guy pulls wires from my head, eventually someone comes to tell my mom that I have optical migraines, but no worries! Mine are triggered by a combination of types of food (lots of junk) and lack of sleep. Ta da! And then he sent us on our merry way to get that plaster our of my very, very long hair.

What’s the first thing we do? We eat at El Toro Taco, the best hole-in-the-wall place that served Toro Burgers, which is basically taco meat in a hot dog bun, served with the secret sauce and cheese. Yum! It was heavenly after that fasting. However, getting all the plaster out of my hair wasn’t. It took 3 washings to remove it. My poor mom, I’m sure she was transported back to the time when I was three and full of sand…

Fast forward to Pep Rallies, school games and “dances” (You know – the times when music was played, but no one would get out there to dance because no one would ask the other to dance. Instead there was lots of talking above the music and head-bobbing all around.) Cheerleaders and players. Yelling for your team and laughing with your friends. Comforting someone who ran to the bathroom in tears because her boyfriend of two weeks broke up with her and now she’s destined to thwart love forever! (Not me by the way. My time came when I was much more mature – like in 10th grade.) These were the moments that made up 8th grade.

Sleepovers and playtimes. Makeup and daydreams. Wanting to grow up, yet still enjoying being a kid. Getting to go to a movie without a parent. Eating cold pizza and guzzling a good portion of the 3-litre of Coke. These were exciting times in the life of a 13 year old. Things were changing, and we were just along for the ride.

But not all change was good. Jenny A., a sweet, likable girl who seemed to have it all – a nice jock-boyfriend, a position on the cheerleading team, the latest in clothes, she took her life one day – shot herself without fully thinking of the ramifications of what it would mean to those left behind. Though I was not bosom buddies with her, I remember crying and being stunned, over the loss, over the sadness, over her hopelessness. I still don’t to this day know why she did it. I do remember thinking that if she had just held on a little longer, things might have been different for her…

Why did life have to be so confusing and unstable? We were just kids!

But thank you God for short-term memories. Life resumed at its normal pace, and the thrill of living returned soon enough. School and its work did not stop. Church activities still blossomed, creating more and more endearing relationships with those in the same group. Life as a middle schooler continued with a determined hope that things would never be bad enough that it couldn’t be handled in the here and now. I’d rather live and cry than to die and to miss out on the things to come – whatever those things happened to be.

Summer came and with it came thoughts of my biggest challenge yet – high school. I wouldn’t be a fish in the pond any more. I would be a little minnow in a sea of faces. 1 in 1,600 because we had a large high school… but I was ready for it. I had energy and hope to spare and the friends to help with all the fun to come.

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Prêt-à-Porter, Fiesta Style!

Welcome to my closet! Come in, come in. There’s not much room, but maybe if we rotate a bit, I can get you all in here.

Chocolate strawberries anyone? How about some mozzarella sticks? Oh and just take your pick of wine or Diet Coke (Blech, if I do say so myself). If we run out, I’ll just send Mr. Right out for more. He’s really good like that.

Comfy? Good. Now let me share a bit about myself with you so that you can understand my closet a bit more.

I cannot express to you enough my loathing of shopping for clothes. Well, loathe is too strenuous of a word, but the idea surrounding “loathe” fits.

Dislike

Have an aversion to

Find it a huge waste of time

Yeah all those fit. There have been 4 times that I’ve actually enjoyed shopping for apparel.

1. The first time was with my mom back in 1987. One day, she walked up to me and said, “Let’s head to the mall together and hit the sales.” I don’t ever recall her asking to do this before – just us girls, one on one. (Sure we shopped before, but this was a big deal, like one woman to another.) I went and had a great time with my mom. I think I liked it mostly because I was actually with her, talking, laughing and getting her unstuck from dress that thought it was Venom. Oh, and we had Milano’s Pizza, the best pizza bar none. That was memorable too.
2. Next was the time when I moved to Nebraska to be with Mr. Right. He said that my clothes, my good Southern clothes- thankyouverymuch, wouldn’t be good enough for a single winter day, even if I wore them all at the same time. I told him that I had sweaters and he laughed. In my face. It was a good thing that I loved him! Alas, he was so right. I froze my patoot off until I had a real coat and clothes to go under them. Plus, I felt like Pretty Woman, without all the sex and Polo. (Virgin, remember? And Nebraska! No Polo player worth his weight in salt would go to Nebraska for the game. Sheesh…)
3. Then there was shopping for my wedding dress. I did it with Mr. Right and my mom. Yes, Mr. Right helped to pick out my wedding dress. Hey, I figured that if I’m going to blow that much money on a dress, I might as well pick one that he liked too. It turned out to be the fourth dress I tried. AND it was on sale. Bonus! (I still tried on other dresses because hello! Wedding dresses! You don’t get to try those on every day…)
4. Lastly, there was the day I took The Girl out of school to shop at the Junior League store. That was a blast! We both left with some “new” things to add to our closet. More importantly, we left with a memory that still makes us both smile.
   

Four times out of 36 years of living is quite pitiful. I recognize this fact. But I am the way I am. I don’t like all the fuss and bother of trying on new clothes, and really when I think about the money it can cost, it just sets my heart racing. ($40 for jeans! $100 for a new coat! $150 for shoes! Ack!)

If it were up to me, I’d run around naked as a jaybird. But then again, I’d be in a loony bin. Not nearly as much fun as being crazy on a blog. So I do have some clothes to show you after all. You’re welcome.

Mind you, I’m a working woman. I mean that I work outside of the home as well as taking care of the home. I have to wear “appropriate attire” in the office. So here goes…

In this array of clothes, you’ll find Ann Taylor and Banana Republic Suits, Gap, Express, Wet Seal, Liz Claiborne, Talbot’s, 5th Avenue… and others that I can’t even remember. Can I just share with you how much I really like well-made clothes? Well, I do. I just don’t like going to get them…

Sometimes I wear these when the boss is gone. Tee hee!

By the time I’m home, I just want to chuck these clothes and head straight for the jammie pants. So I do.

But when I’m ready for a play date with Mr. Right or time out with a friend, you can find me in some comfy clothes like these:

Now, knowing that I don’t want to go and shop and that I cringe at the thought of spending a ton on clothes, you might ask how I own some things that take time to find.

Here is where Big Mama might want to avert her eyes. I’m pretty sure she won’t answer the phone any more when I call if she knows this about me.

She gone? Good. I’ll let you in on a little secret. Come closer because I can’t let everyone know…

I got all of the above on ebay (and more that I didn’t show you – there were 74 pieces all together) for less than $150… including postage. That works out to $2 per piece! Fortunately for me, the sellers did all the hard work of putting it together. Now I don’t have to wonder if A goes with Q or if I have anything that will go with that shirt. It’s all done for me. Remarkably, every single thing fits perfectly – even the jeans – and is in style. Woo hoo! If you realize anything about me now, it’s that I don’t have much of a fashion sense which is alright with me because that just leaves me more time and energy for the fun stuff like reading and eating. You can send Big Mama back in now.

And that concludes the tour of Shalee’s closet. Hope you’ll be able to come back later when I tell you about shopping at another place that will probably have Big Mama breathing hard with disbelief. I know that she’s already trying to figure out how to convince me that the world cannot run without a love for a great pair of flip flops.

Enough of this clothes stuff! Let’s head down to the kitchen and I’ll show the insides of the fridge that has some killer apple pie, brownies and cheesecake. Oh and as always, there’s some kickin’ coffee to go with it. Then we’ll talk about how I got my shoes…

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